Tuesday, April 06, 2010



a night's rest has therapeutic wonders.
gah. anger is futile =(

and now it's another 3 period break. though one has but passed and my next break is taken up by The Tempest - Meet the Cast session. And I'm kinda hungry but I'm not in the mood to eat.

I wish one of The Three of them would come by. cause i've got stuff weighing down upon me, stuff that makes my heart so heavy that I want to puke. yeah, thank Hadi for that quote. seriously though.

I think it's really annoying when people tell me news that they feel is important; and that they feel i should feel is important. my friend told me that apparently 'most' of the j1s have a bad impression of me. and this friend said it with an expression that very clearly anticipated a reaction from me.

"Heyyy you know, most of the J1s right... they have a bad impression of you!"
"Uhhh okay."
"Dude you don't care?"
"No."
"Dude, it's the J1s man, they-"
"I already said I don't care."
"You're such a loser man, seriously."
"Because I don't care about some hearsay regarding some people who don't matter that much to me? Or because I'm not giving you the reaction you want?"

I find it amusing that that "friend" thinks it's normal for me to be concerned. it bewilders me, honestly. why should I care about people who, in 1 months' time, will be of neither matter nor concern to me, who I will probably never encounter again once i leave MJC and if I do encounter, will probably not remember anything anyway. so seriously, why should i care how a bunch of people, who don't know jacksquat about me and whom I, on my part, don't see a reason to care for, see me? i don't care, I don't care. I. Don't. Care.

I know I'm loved. That's the only armour and sword I need to soldier on.

...
and yes, sometimes i feel like i need to be stronger.