Sunday, March 28, 2010
In many ways, CTC reminded me of Odyssey.
Both events were events that I invested
so much effort into and I'm not even sure I invested more in CTC than Odyssey.
Both events saw tears from Councillors.
Both events saw Council as a family.
Both events will forever remain in my heart.
Right now, I'm still kinda numb that CTC has ended. After intensive planning for several months, having your event over in 2 days feels kinda fast. I'm glad that the 8ths had fun; I'm glad I've learnt so much about what I can do, what I cannot do and what I have to learn to do from CTC.
But really, what I remember most about the camp
Is realizing how much
just how much
the Council means to me.
Lowering our flag was painful
Because we'll never do morning ass o' doom again.
cause we'll never plan teachers' day together again
nor prom
nor ogl camp
nor orientation
nor ctc
nor invest.
i've gotten so used to seeing their faces everyday
i'm not sure how it's going to be like not seeing them everyday inside that room.
it's like waking up in your room but with different coloured walls.
everything feels the same.
but you just know that your boundaries have changed.
council was my boundary. my so-damn-important boundary.
the kind of boundary that doesn't really exist, the kind of boundary that repels you out of your comfort zone.
it's like the rope in bungee-jumping.
yeah sure you're doing something you're not entirely comfortable with and it's scary as hell.
but you have that tether-rope
and with 31 people holding onto that rope.
how much safer can I get?
despite knowing that it's good I'm finally stepping down and (hopefully) now able to concentrate on my studies, i still cried yesterday.
i wasn't really sad... it was just the memories that came back and the tide of emotions that overwhelmed me.
remembering how much we've gone through as a council.
and i cried simply because i realized just how much i loved the experience.
realized it deeper and simpler than i've ever realized it before.
in ki, we wonder if there's
Absolute Right, a truth that is so 'correct', so simple and so irrefutable.
joining council is my absolute right.
...
and yes, thirty-two is better than one.
Lino squeezed Panda at 8:25 PM
Thursday, March 18, 2010
It's so nice to be enjoying my long-deserved March Holidays, getting 10 hours of sleep everyday. Gaming and studying in moderation because i have no upcoming tests and i'm free to go out with friends everyday to Tampines Library to read and indulge in WonderlandEFF MBTS.
plus my new timetable sucks massive balls. 5.05 on thursday because of self-study after common lunch? that is so bullshit. i want back my 4.15 ending times!
Peasants GPers end at 1.45. Unfair much. Why do the
Elite KIers have to end later than the
hoi polloi GP people -.-
(this is a bitchy post if you have not figured it out. it's also pretty damn shallow so if you're looking for one of my more-insightful posts, skip right down a couple of posts or so. just not this one)
i've also rediscovered my hatred for maths; it dwindled down to a gentle flame but with the advent of the MBTs, it has returned as a blazing inferno that reaches very high ( think higher than jarwiiis ) and
consumes maths notes/tests/tutorials for fuel. burn, baby burn.
...
and yes, studying can make one dumber, or insane at least.
Lino squeezed Panda at 12:25 AM
Sunday, March 07, 2010
The past few days have really made me wonder what a 'family' means to me.
it's so near the end of our term, yet there are still rifts and cracks in the foundation of our love. can't we just hold it all together for this one more month? it's just one more month for us to show each other how much we really care, how much we go the extra distance because
we want to see the smile on his or her face because that's the greatest kind of joy.
i've spent these few weeks really looking around the family, observing every little thing that's said and done. all the little stupid mistakes that people make are so treasured, because i know i'm going to
miss these stupid mistakes once our term ends.
i really just want all of us to stick together.
i just wanna forgive everyone and love everyone.
i just want us to be a real family.
cause right now...
we're just fragments.
...
and yes, my heart is desperate
Lino squeezed Panda at 9:46 PM
