Sunday, June 18, 2006



[MSN Convo]
Sophie - "I should just cram you into a corset and dangle you from the ceiling.for some random unfathomable reason."

Hmmm...Yup, I've been bitten by the [Mmmmm] and [Hmmmm] bugs. Very contagious I tell you.

Well, today was pretty uneventful. Got seriously thrashed at DotA, but no one wants to hear about how I was mercilessly out-farmed, denied and eventually, repeatedly Laguna Blade'd and Assassinated. The pain. And only my 2nd time using the absolutely adorable Pandaren Battle/BrewMaster. He's so cute and powerful.

We all know the famous saying :
"Powerful things come in cute packages."
As well as:
"With great cuteness comes great responsibility."

Yup, those two old sayings are definitely well-known. They look slightly weird though...Maybe I mixed up the words slightly. Oh well, life goes on even after this terrible tragedy.

Haiya, my holiday homework is still completely untouched, save for the half-finished Chinese Homework. Maths is bleh...and I bet Ridha hasn't done his share of the Science project. Not that I blame him, I haven't done mine and Adeeb's internet commited suicide and they are now replacing it with Broadband. Smart move. He says he'll be getting MSN. YAY!

Time for the top 5 song thingies.

5th: I Believe In You - Il Divo Ft. Celine Dion
Well, what can I say? First off, this is a song sung by the very sexy quartet Il Divo. They are joined by the also-incredibly sexy Celine Dion. A song in both English and French ( also another secksy language ), this song is upbeat, inspiring and enthusiastic.

4th: Eighth World Wonder - Kimberly Locke
Hmmm, an old song sung by a good singer (In my opinion). Very fast-paced, with a lovely bridge and chorus. Definitely a must-hear if you want upbeat love songs. Which I happen to be an avid fan of. Yes, I am a soppy love-song beast. Rawr.

3rd: Man In The Mirror - Michael Jackson
The inclusion of this song booted Eighth World Wonder and I Believe In You down to 4th and 5th respectively, and completely eliminated the former 5th place I Believe I Can Fly.
Anyways, this song talks about improving the world by starting with yourself. The perfect song for those who have the I-Must-Make-A-Positive-Difference-In-This-World type of delusionalpeople. Also on that note, listen to Heal The World by Michael Jackson.

2nd: First Love - Utada Hikaru
A mainly-Japanese song with only snippets of English here and there. A song we're playing for CO too, only of course, without the lovely Utada Hikaru to sing. We could substitute her with someone like Justin, but we want high-quality singers, not low-quality rubbish. Sorry, just a poke at Justin, or Justyna as a certain someone calls it him. Back to the song, I didn't bother to translate the lyrics and I have a reason: I'm a lazy person. So sucks for you. It's a love song though, so if you want to really enjoy this song, go translate the lyrics. Love songs are one of the few genres where a good portion of the song "quality", so to speak, lies in the lyrics.

1st: That's The Way It Is - Celine Dion ( Ft. N'Sync )
Just a note, the reason I put the brackets around Ft. N'Sync is because the original recording of this song does not feature N'Sync. However, Celine Dion performed live with N'Sync doing backup vocals. I prefer the N'Sync version, and you can find said video here. Go watch it, because Celine Dion is a fantastic singer with vocals that are out of this world.

Now for a little rant. Warning: People who like heavy/Death metal are advised to stop reading.





I really find Heavy/Death metal retarded. In my opinion, anyone can scream, not sing, scream it. All you need to do is grow really long hair, hang lots of skull earrings and scream like a retarded banshee being disemboweled. Oh yeah, and be reeeeally emo. Like this:
[Incredibly high-pitched and whiny voice]
SLIT MY WRISTSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

To complete it, you must also write incredibly stupid poetry with insubstantial lyrics that revolve around death, pain and destruction. Your poem should include the line "Slit My Wrists" for maximum impact.

Remember all you crazy heavy/death metal wanna-bes: No poem, or retarded heavy/death metal'ist is ever complete if you cannot find some way to insert "Slit My Wrists" into at least 75% of your words. This includes, but isn't limited to, song lyrics and conversations.

If possible, expand your circle of corruption by writing children's books like "Barney goes to prison". Also include cookbooks so as to corrupt the innocent housewives. Contrary to popular belief, an emo cookbook is pretty simple to write:
"Step 1: Slice the potatoes"
Step 2: Slit your wrists
Step 3: Garnish potatoes with blood-sauce.
Step 4: Slit your wrists."


For inspiration, I also advise listening to this particular line from this particular song from this particular band:

[Retarded voice] WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE ME UP, WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN SEPTEMBER ENDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

Those who are already masters of the heavy/death metal genres, congrats. You guys/girls are famous for your retardedess. Rejoice. But wait! There's no time for rest, you still need to do 2 more things.

Number 1: You must, somehow, find a company stupid enough to manufacture plushies/dolls in your likeness. You must, absolutely MUST, request that these evil dolls look every bit as horrifying as you. As a check, give it to a child as a surprise present. If the child cries or commits suicide, the doll is correct. And of course, you must release limited edition Voodoo dolls. I will buy them all and happily destroy them.

Number 2: Ok, it's been 25 years since you've faded from your glory as wailing banshees. What do you do?

That's right! Release an album of all your hit songs! Make sure that there is no difference from the original tracks at all! Don't worry that your fans won't buy them. Chances are, if they are your fans in the first place, then their brains are obviously not working and thus, they'll happily walk up to the music stand and buy your cd.

After slitting their wrists of course.


GOD, I HATE HEAVY METAL AND DEATH METAL!